Search terms

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I have to admit to a kind of odd fascination with seeing what search terms people use to access pages on my Web site. I’m not at all surprised by the top search terms, of course: TriTryst, Marine Military Academy, Windows Help, CAB Compression, and various terms leading to my Did You Ever Wonder goofiness. Variations of those terms make up 25 to 30 percent of the search hits. I am surprised and often amused by some of the less common searches:

  • In September and October, I got quite a few search hits looking for Halloween costumes, in particular a “priest and altar boy” costume. I’ll leave the description to somebody else. It’s unfortunate that last October when I was discussing religion, I mentioned having been an altar boy. Combined with my Halloween costume pictures…Oh well.
  • September also brought a very large number of queries on “notes” for various books that I’ve mentioned over the years. I suspect most of these are college students looking for an alternative to actually reading the books before writing a report. What surprises me most about these hits is that I have to be way down in the rankings for those searches. Imagine how much of the book the searcher could have read in the time he spent scouring the Web for a “shortcut.”
  • “bird hits window” was something of a surprise search result. It garnered almost one percent of the 1000+ search hits. I’m pretty sure that query landed the people on this page.
  • Several people were wondering “how to dispose of a toilet.” I wish I knew! I still have two that I need to get rid of.
  • I got a surprising number of hits on search terms relating to dog attacks, and pit bulls in particular. If the person looking for “the worst case of mange in pit bull history” will contact me, I’ll be happy to share some pictures of Charlie from when he showed up in 2002.
  • The results of searching Google for “mischel porn” have one of my pages at the top, followed immediately by three mentions of Mischel Internet Security’s TrojanHunter product.
  • I have absolutely no idea what “ham so-won nude” is. Or a “deff guide”, either.
  • I don’t know who was looking for “random fat people”, but you won’t find them on my site. Try the local all you can eat place.
  • My favorite for the month has to be “marginally bright mischel”. Somebody has me all figured out.